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 I Hate to be 'That' Guy
Column Posted by The 'I Hate to be That Guy' Guy on 11:41:15 AM Jul 18, 2011




I Hate to be ‘That’ Guy…

I’ll make it short, as everyone’s already weighed in on this… I just suddenly felt the urge to write this as I was running my daily mile on the treadmill… You can tell fatigue was really setting in…

Last night, we witnessed what started off as the World’s Best Angle, turn into the World’s Greatest Main Event. We witnessed what was quite possibly the World’s Best Pay-Per-View of the year 2011. Twitter, Facebook, and every other Social Networking website were buzzing about Money in the Bank, and why shouldn’t they? The crowd was electric all night, and the Internet Wrestling Community were finally given what they’ve all wanted to see: The Awakening of the World’s Strongest Man.

That’s right, folks! Last night, in the heart of Chicago, history was made as for the first time in his storied 15 year career; Mark Henry was allowed to be exactly what he was billed for a decade and a half. He was truly the World’s Strongest man. I’ll be fair. Big Show didn’t have to do what he did last night. He could have performed his usual stiff and wooden style, but instead he went out and played the Barry Harowitz role. Four five minutes and 56 seconds, Big Show bumped all over the place, and ended up taking FOUR finishers from Mark Henry, being pinned squeaky clean in the center of the ring, followed up with a career shortening splash from The World’s Strongest with a chair wrapped around his leg. Allow me to repeat that last statement. Mark Henry hit a Vader-style splash off the ropes onto Big Show’s leg with a chair wrapped around it.

Everyone can celebrate some guy “work-shooting” on a microphone for three straight weeks followed by a win marred with interference, but only one man got a massive, sustained push for the past two months; tearing down cage walls, throwing audio technicians like they’re wrestling buddy pillows, and spearing giants off of stages. There was only one man who re-solidified himself as the most dominant force in the WWE. The World’s Strongest Man. And he did all of this without having to use any type of performance enhancing drug. (Shot out to Sin Cara for getting himself suspended for using steroids this early in his WWE career. Epic Fail. And Yes Micky, I’m laughing at you.)

So, what’s next? Mark Henry, on the night of his trade back to Smackdown, with tear-filled eyes spoke about his weight loss, and stated that he would be World Champion by the end of 2011. If everything we’ve seen from him thus far in the year is any indication, he’s well on track. When Daniel Bryan defeats Christian for the World Title somewhere down the line within the next few months, Bryan better watch his back, because as the lyrics state:

Somebody gon' get they ass kicked
Somebody gon' get their wig split
Somebody gon' get they ass kicked
Somebody gon' get their wig split
Beat 'em up, beat 'em up, break his neck, break his neck
Beat 'em up, beat 'em up, break his neck, break his neck
Beat 'em up, beat 'em up, break his neck, break his neck
Beat 'em up, beat 'em up, break his neck, break his neck

Those are prophetic words by “Three 6 Mafia,” prophetic words.



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